A man walks into a bar and orders a glass of Polish vodka. As the bartender slides the drink to the patron, a man sitting next to him remarks, "That's a coincidence, I, too, am enjoying a Polish vodka. Since
I arrived from the old country, this is the only bar in which I have found it."
To which the first replies, "Old country, I'm from the old country. Let me buy you another!"
As the drinks are being poured, one of the men asks, "What part of the old country are you from?"
"Krakow," replies the other. "This is weird," says the first, "I, too, am from Krakow! Let's get another shot."
After the new round arrives, the first asks, "So, pal, what did you do back in Krakow?'
"Not much, really, I came here right out of high school. I graduated from Lech Walesa Technical Academy in '81."
"This is eerie," replies the other, "I'm Welesa Tech, '81. Let's get another shot." But the bartender says, "Slow down fellas, I gotta make a call."
The bartender calls his wife and tells her that he'll be late getting home. When she inquires as to the cause, he replies, "Oh, the friggin' Liszjewski twins are here again."
THREE PRISONERS OF WAR ARE HELD AT A GERMAN CAMP.
ONE IS A JEW. ONE IS A ITALIAN. THE THIRD A POLISH GUY.
ALL ARE CONDEMNED TO THE FIRING SQUAD.
FIRST TO BE CALLED IS THE JEW.
HE IS TIED TO THE POLE AND ASKED TO SAY A FEW WORDS.
HE THINKS AND YELLS OUT "LOOK LOOK RAIN RAIN".
THE GERMAN SOLDIERS TURN TO SEE WHAT HE IS YELLING ABOUT AND HE ESCAPES.
THE ITALIAN GUY SEES WHATS GOING ON AND "SAYS GREAT IDEA". THE GERMAN SOLDIERS TAKE HIM NEXT AND TIE HIM TO
THE POLE. AS THEY MAKE READY, HE YELLS "THUNDER, THUNDER". AS THEY TURN THEIR HEADS THE ITALIAN GUY ESCAPES.
THE POLISH GUY THINKS AND HAS A GREAT IDEA.
THE GERMANS COME AND GRAP HIM. THEY ARE REALLY MAD AT
THIS POINT. THE POLISH GUY GOES EASY AND ALLOWS THEM TO
TIE HIS HANDS. THEY ASK HIM IF HE WOULD LIKE A CIGARETTE.
THYE POLISH GUY SAYS NO. THE GERMANS SAY OK ITS TIME.
THEY MAKE READY THE FIRING SQUAD.
FIVE GERMAN MARKSMEN ARE READY TO TAKE AIM. THE GERMAN OFFICER ASKS THE POLISH GUY IF HE HAS ONE LAST THING TO SAY.
THE POLISH GUY KNOWS HE HAS THE BEST PLAN FOR ESCAPE.
HE TELLS THE GERMAN OFFICER "I DO HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY"
THE GERMAN OFFICER ASKS WHAT IS IT. THE POLISH GUY YELLS
FIRE..... FIRE.... FIRE...
